I know people think critics are at our computers relishing every chance we get to tear into popular films. We are like the evil mad scientists of the arts world. Alas I must be a weirdo because I much prefer championing films, especially small underdogs, rather than tearing them down.

That said. I will always be honest. No matter how beloved a film or franchise may be I will tell my readers what I actually think- good or bad. Unfortunately today is on the negative side. I saw Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes which is a sequel to previous trilogy in the series. For the record, I enjoyed the Andy Serkis led trilogy especially Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (it has one of my all time favorite movie scenes when Gary Oldman’s character is able to turn on his ipad and see photos of his kids. Devastating.) The last in the trilogy, War for the Planet of the Apes, was a little overwrought and heavy-handed but the characters were compelling enough for me to stay invested.

Such was not the case with the new Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes. I cannot overstate how uninterested I was in the story for this one. It’s not really that it was slow (which it is) but the nice bird monkey fighting with the fascist monkey was the opposite of compelling. I obviously won’t spoil anything but suffice it to say they did not make me care about what was happening with this old human electrical plant or the rants of the fascist monkey. It was so boring.

The other problem is (aside from a cameo) Andy Serkis isn’t in this film and you can tell. He is a master at creating emotion and a full performance in motion capture. These actors portraying the apes aren’t nearly so gifted. It’s similar to the problems of  2019’s The Lion King with animals coming off as flat, bland and emotion-free as possible. Unfortunately the human characters are even worse with Freya Allan being completely bland in the lead role of Mae. It would be one thing if she is supposed to be a feral type human creature but she’s vocal and has a personality- just not much of one.

I seem to be in the minority on Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes, and far be it for me to deny people the joys of watching animals fight over a power plant. However, I certainly didn’t get it. Honestly I’d prefer the Tim Burton version of this story. At least that is bad in more interesting ways (and it’s bad.) I couldn’t wait for it to be over.

3 out of 10

Frown Worthy

 

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