Movie 45: Home on the Range

October 4, 2014October 4, 2014 | Rachel's Reviews

Gather round kids. Let me tell you a tale of the fearsome outlaw who almost took down Sheriff Disney and his entire 2D team…

Yes that’s right. It’s time to talk about Home on the Range. The movie which for 5 years would be blamed for shutting down the Disney 2D hand drawn animation department. Then Princess and the Frog came out and all was right again in the world…

So, is it worthy of the hate? Pretty much yes. I liked some of the animation and the music was entertaining but the rest was a mess.

Production-

There is basically no production information out there on this movie and sorry guys I was not about to watch it twice with audio commentary…I love you but not that much.

So, instead of talking about the process and ideas let me just make a couple comments.

First, this movie cost $110 million dollars to make. That seems impossible. Where did the money go? As a point of contrast in 2002 an underrated film, The Wild Thornberry’s Movie, came out (which I should have featured in my non-Disney animation I like). That movie is set in Africa, has great music, a cast as well-known as Home on the Range and it cost 35 million. I defy anyone to make the argument Wild Thornberry’s Movie looks nearly 3 times cheaper to make than Home on the Range . Seriously what the heck Disney?

35 million

110 million?

But I’m not critiquing the budget. It just makes a girl wonder. Could this be like the ‘we know it is going to be terrible movie’ like in The Producers? I mean watch the movie and tell me that is not a possibility. In any case, I find it very hard to believe anyone was actually trying to make a good movie here.

The other production point I’d like to bring up is another example of the complete ineptitude of the MPAA. Home on the Range gets a PG rating! And you want to know why? Because a line Roseann cow says about her utters being ‘real, don’t stare’. That line is somehow worthy of a PG when burning a family alive in a house and singing about lust, rape and murder gets a G for Hunchback? That makes no sense. A cows utters are more offensive to the MPAA than a family almost being burned alive! Let that sink in…

I can’t say it enough don’t listen to the ratings. They are worthless! Do your research and decide for yourself if the movie is for you and your children.

It’s what you get from having an organization police and rate itself. Unbelievable.

The only other production note is it looks a lot like Pecos Bill from Melody Time (1948) which I gave a B+ to and enjoy much more than this). I even wonder if they used some of the red rock backgrounds from Pecos Bill for this movie. It wouldn’t be above the Disney team to do so. They certainly didn’t improve upon 1948 imagery.

From Pecos Bill

From Home on the Range.

The Story-

As I describe this story I want to remind you- this is the studio who made turning into a llama funny and endearing. Good writing can make any story, no matter how formulaic or strange good. Look at Babe, one of my favorite children’s films of all time. It is about a barnyard in peril but it has such heart and the script is so well written. Here we get nothing new except for a little yodeling.

Basically a cow voiced by Roseann Barr (yes you read right…who thought that was a good idea?) is sold to The Patch O’Heaven farm where all animals are treated like the family. She is an award winning cow who’s master has to sell her because his entire 500 cow fleet has been stolen. She joins 2 other cows, one a cliche of new age niceness voiced by the always great Jennifer Tilly, and proper prim hat wearing Mrs Calloway voiced by Judi Dench (yes Dame Judi Dench is in this thing). Wouldn’t it make more sense for the show cow to be voiced by the Brit? Wouldn’t it make sense for the new girl to be all prim and proper?

Well, the farm owner is Mrs Pearl and she is completely forgettable. (Again think of Babe and how much you love Farmer Hoggett by the end of that movie…). She is behind on her payments and the sheriff is going to auction off the property (how many times have we seen that plot? The whole ‘we have to save the farm, or the orphanage or civic center etc’…snoozefest).

And if things are so bad why does Pearl have the money to buy a prize winning cow and couldn’t she sell it? I get she has attachments to the other animals but she literally just got Maggie (Roseanne Cow). That makes no sense.

But here I am trying to apply sense to a movie about cows saving the day (again can be done well, look at Babe).

There is a nice song sung by KD Lang about the farm.

So off our cows go to save the farm and they have an embarrassing scene in a saloon and then meet Buck a high dreaming horse who wants to be a sheriff (think of Maximus in Tangled. He does the Sheriff horse thing so much better without saying one word). Buck is voiced by Cuba Gooding Jr in an annoying performance, which is obviously trying to be Chris Rock in Madagascar and Eddie Murphy in Shrek and Mulan. It fails. Plus, he is in the movie kind of erratically.

At least to me, it is not funny to have a horse ninja chop a bunch of outlaws. How would he even know how to do that? Why not have him be great with a gun? In a world where horses can fight that makes more sense or a lasso would have been cool. Again Maximus is so much more subtle and funny.

And there is Rico who Buck wants to work with who is an obvious parody of Clint Eastwood but do the kids even know who that is or what it is paying homage too? I hope not because Clint Eastwood westerns are really violent and why not get Clint to do the voice? That would have been entertaining to the adults at least.

He is in the movie sporadically also. Not enough to understand what he is doing or care. Think in the Jungle Book we get very little time with Kaaa but it is enough to find him chilling and to understand who he is as a character.

I will add there are also a lot of toddler level jokes which have also been done with a lot more humor and effect in other films. Things like burping pigs aren’t funny to me…

So, the cows get given to a Chinese man in a strange scene with subtitles and our villain finally comes named Alameda Slim who is obese- how hilarious he’s named slim and is fat! Ha, ha, ha…that’s what goes as humor in this movie!

He is voiced by Randy Quaid and he has the most unusal super power I’ve ever heard of. He can hypnotize cows with his magic yodeling… Again, anything can be good with good writing but this is pushing it.

He has hypnotized herds all over the valley and then when the ranches are destitute like Roseann Cow’s ranch he buys them at auction using the most obvious disguise I’ve ever seen.

In order to buy this scheme you would have to assume that every ranch hand is a complete moron. Plus, cows are big and yet he has them all in a cave. 500 bovines in a cave…that is some cave.

That said, the yodel song was animated pretty well. It’s a copy of Pink Elephants on Parade and Heffalumps and Woozles but since that was a long time ago I’ll let it slide.

The music in general in the movie is pretty good. Alan Menken did the melodies and then there are country/pop stars like KD Lang and Tim McGraw who sing.

I particularly liked Alan Menken’s Aaron Copelanish score. That man can do anything

So basically the last half of Home on the Range is the cows chasing Slim around. At one point they end up on a bad CGI train until they catch him, and spoiler alert win back the farm. Oh and Rico is a double agent but we haven’t gotten to know him, so I really didn’t care.

Movie Review/Conclusion-

home on the range 3 — There is some nice southwest animation although the characters are rough to look at.

So, basically this one is a skip. The humor is sophomoric and unoriginal. The storyline is so predicable. The yodeling was an interesting twist but aside from the one song nothing interesting is really done with it.

The backgrounds are pretty and I liked the music but that’s about it. My advice get Melody TIme and watch Pecos Bill. If you do, you will see Roy Rodgers and hear a Western Tale how it is supposed to be told.

Overall Grade- D- (I give it a hair up on Brother Bear because at least I liked the music in this and I did think it was pretty at spots and thought the yodel song was marginally clever but they both suck)

Disney you are killing me here!!!! And just think this was the era of Pixar glory! The Incredibles came out this year for goodness sake! Sigh…

Movie 44: Brother Bear

October 3, 2014October 3, 2014 | Rachel's Reviews

I’ll just give a warning before reading this review. If you like Brother Bear you probably don’t want to read further because I did not. It had such potential but everything about it was a failure. So, if reading a review of someone who dislikes something you like is an unpleasant experience for you than STOP READING NOW!

In 2003 I went on a mission for my church so for 2 years I didn’t see any movies and with new movies coming out when I came home I never really got to play catch up. Sure I watched the 3rd Harry Potter movie, The Incredibles and Return of the King but that was about it in the 2003-2005 era. If one had a bad reputation I skipped it and moved on. Brother Bear was one of those films and I hate to say it but I’m glad I did.

I’m sorry guys but this movie stinks.

Literally every choice I would have advised them to reconsider. Everything from the yogi bearish 2D characters on top of the deep canvas which looked strange, the odd voice cast, the underwhelming songs, the uber-predictable story, the painful attempts at humor and the incredibly unlikable lead character made it a very unpleasant experience. Honestly I’m struggling to find anything I like about this one.

bears8 — Just look at the way these characters look? It’s enough for me to know the movie is not for me. I would rather watch episodes of the Gummy Bears and notice our lead character scowling as he does the whole movie...

Unfortunately I’m not the most witty writer in the world (at least I can admit it unlike the writers of this movie…) but my friend over at Disney Movie Year wrote a very funny review of Brother Bear. He liked it about as much I did…

https://disneymovieyear.wordpress.com/2014/09/29/week-44-brother-bear/

The Production-

It is obvious from the start of the movie Brother Bear tries to recycle themes, characters even whole scenes from Lion King, Pocahontas, Tarzan, Treasure Planet, and more. One article I read (information was fairly sparse on this one) said

“Michael Eisner informed the animation department that he wanted a movie about bears. What about bears? The fact that they are readily marketable, in Stepakoff’s estimation. Various ideas were kicked around – “bear King Lear”, “bear Antigone”, none of which came to fruition, surprisingly.

I mean, by God, if “the CEO wants to sell teddy bears” isn’t going to inspire writers to do their best work, what on Earth possibly could? (http://antagonie.blogspot.com/2009/12/disney-animation-well-and-truly-im-on.html)

Well said but even a commercial cash grab can turn out interesting as Disney has proven many times (think Robin Hood) but the choices they made are so strange.

Movie Review/Conclusion

brother_bear_09-1 — **I wish I could get rid of the cartoonish bears and just look at pretty Alaska… I mean look at the bear with the bangs? It looks so strange**

Everything in the movie looked odd to me. The way the characters are designed on top of the Deep Canvas background always felt off. Also the voice casting never seemed to fit.

The songs are super lame and who thinks ‘Intuit bear story’ and then ‘I’ll hire Tina Turner’? I don’t get it? That makes no sense? There were so many strange choices like that.

The story is so predictable. Every time it took the obvious turn I groaned at the screen. And the sentimental moments are not earned by the characters. I don’t believe the journey they are on or even understand why it is completely necessary. I mean does every teenager who mouths off and acts in anger get turned into a bear in the world of this story? Even if you accept his punishment, I saw no change or growth and the events on their road trip are so obvious and so predictable they bored me to the point I kept checking the time left on the netflix stream….It wouldn’t speed up but seemed to have a half an hour left for 3 hours….

Just bad choices all around. The dialogue is awful. The script feels childish and a lot of times we are introduced to characters and then we never hear form them again. Something usually isn’t funny if we have just met a character. Honestly the script left me aghast at it’s stupidity. I expect better from Disney! (No wonder this only has 32% on Rotten tomatoes…)

For example, there is a line in the movie where the two moose are playing ‘I spy’ and they go back and forth spying things and I kept waiting for the joke. There was no joke!! It was just a 2 minute bit of dialogue playing I spy and I guess that’s supposed to be funny? And I guess talking ‘Canadian’ and saying hosier a lot is also supposed to be funny? It certainly didn’t make me laugh.

There were so many befuddling moments like that? Why attempt to treat the Intuit culture so carefully at the beginning and then have modern voices speaking the way modern teens would speak? That was so distracting. There’s one scene where some billygoats who are introduced and forgotten about in like 2 minutes, say shut up 7 times. Is that supposed to be funny characters saying shut up a lot?

bears5 — **Again look at the banged bear. Doesn’t that just look so badly designed?**

Aladdin could get away with modern voiced characters because there was no attempt to be authentic to Arabic culture. Same with Hercules.

The other huge problem is the lead character is so unlikable. I started to watch after a while (I was so bored) to see when we finally get a smile from Kenai. Literally 1 hr 2 minutes before a smile. He is so winy and for things that don’t seem so bad. It’s not like they are stuck in terrible weather or life is miserable? And at the beginning, so he got a love totem? Is that really such a shameful thing? What a cliche for the male character to hate love and kindness. Groan…It seemed so immature for someone having been officially made a man to be continually harping on it.

bear — **Kenai the most unlikable Disney hero I’ve seen so far that’s for sure. Get used to this facial expression you are going to see a lot of it.**

He is either angry, bitter, or complaining the whole movie. This made his transformation at the end completely unbelievable. The relationship between Koda and Kenai doesn’t feel earned as he goes from hating him to loving him in literally one conversation and musical montage. I realize Tarzan kind of does this but the montage shows weeks of interaction and sharing. This is literally a song and them frolicking in the woods. There’s no sense of time elapsing or growth of characters. And even when he finally smiles he is still kind of a grump. I don’t know when I’ve disliked a lead character more in any movie, Disney or not ..

bears3 — **look how weird these bears look especially the one on the left. They all look very out of place and off putting**

I could keep going but really this movie sucks. I think Bongo is a better bear movie…

I’m sorry if I offend people who like it but I thought every choice they made was wrong. Even the pretty scenery was ruined by the Saturday morning cartoons they placed on top of it. And that’s an insult to Saturday morning cartoons…

I’ll say it again but I really thought this movie sucked and it had such potential, so I’m not inclined to be easy on it. Badly done!

Overall Grade- F

Just to show I’m not alone on this one Rotten tomatoes bottom 2 is Brother Bear and Chicken Little of the Disney Canon. They are the only 2 movies in the 30 percentages (which is pretty amazing when you think about it). Nearly every other Disney movie is pretty close to being fresh. I don’t think any other studio could say that. http://www.rottentomatoes.com/guides/best_disney_animated_movies/

Movie 43: Treasure Planet

October 2, 2014October 2, 2014 | Rachel's Reviews

Guys I have a confession to make. Today after work I put on Treasure Planet ready to take notes for my review and about 20 minutes in I fell asleep. It wasn’t for long and I eventually plied my face off my keyboard and rewound back to my last point awake but it is kind of emblematic of my response to Treasure Planet.

That’s not to say it is a total failure like Dinosaur (which I just must have been more rested that day because that was rough going!). In fact, I’m a little surprised I didn’t love Treasure Planet because I really like Steampunk and adventure stories so it seems like a good fit. I’m probably the only person on the planet who liked Atlantis but didn’t care for Treasure Planet. Oh well!

The Production-

Treasure Planet was the brainchild of Disney greats Ron Clements and John Musker going way back to 1987 when the Disney team met with Jeffrey Katzenberg to brainstorm ideas. For some reason Clements and Musker wanted to put Treasure Island in space and it was even considered as an early option but The Little Mermaid was the choice (how different would things have gone…). Eventually it got to Hercules in 1997 and Clements and Musker made a deal with Disney to direct the film if Treasure Planet could get greenlit.

I’m not up on my steampunk trivia but it seems like 2002 was still early on in the movements popularity; although artists like the Disney team my have been more invested in it earlier than the average person (it certainly existed for many years but in last 5 it has grown more popular and mainstream).

If you don’t know, steampunk is when we combine victorian and futuristic elements together in a stylized way. They have heavy influences from Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Jules Verne and others. Atlantis had many steampunk elements in particular the design of the ship. Treasure Planet has steampunk pretty much everywhere you look. Here is a photo of steampunk fashion and I think you can see it’s influence on the film

Treasure Planet is probably the most steampunk movie ever made (most of the others have been huge flops like Wild, Wild West or The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen).

For some people having Victorian era technology flying through space is a distraction. It wasn’t for me most of the time. The only time it was a little unclear was when they were facing a storm or super nova because in the scene the characters are racing around but I don’t know what a super nova does. I understand water. In the world of this movie where they have anti-gravity Victorian ships what damage can a super nova do? I don’t know. Since they start with an impossible setting they need to explain a little bit or the tension is lost .

In Atlantis the steampunk elements are more window dressing and add color but don’t factor that much into the story. Treasure Planet they are huge with characters dying in storms on the ships and other key moments. Atlantis has tons of plotholes but none that kept me from understanding what was actually happening,.

The other problem is Atlantis was an original story I had never heard of before about a place Disney animators basically invented through combining various lores and cultures. They even created a new language; whereas, Treasure Planet tries to take a story most of us know and present it in this new way. So in the end, despite the imagery, the story feels predictable.

In a way I feel bad for Clements and Musker because they finally get to make their dream project and it isn’t received well. The budget was 140 million and it made 109…Yikes.

They do get a nice voice cast with Joseph Gordon Leavitt, Martin Short (who is used too little), David Hyde Pearce, Laurie Metcalf, Brian Murray and Emma Thompson (who is fabulous as always).

The music is by James Newton Howard with 2 songs by GooGooDolls frontman John Rzeznik. Some people hate his modern song but I actually liked it given the mashup the movie was. It worked. I think there could have been more songs from him.

They also used a technique for layering hand drawn animation on top of CGI and sometimes it works and other times it doesn’t hold up as well. The planet on the paper moon is the white washed CGI city I’ve seen in a million other movies (I realize not back then but other movies art holds up so can’t give this movie an excuse).

The Story-

The story is what we all know from school. Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson. A young boy named Jim is reckless and desires to make his mark on the world.

Jim is arrested and ends up burning down his Mother’s inn. His father has left them and he wants to know why and figure out his life goals.

So he finds a map that looks like a globe and learns he can rebuild his mother’s inn with the treasure from Treasure Planet. (If a whole planet is treasured wouldn’t that have been found by someone? I mean Atlantis was way deep down under water and caves which is a little harder to miss than a giant planet?

Nevertheless Jim gets to the ship and we meet our Smarmy crew, captain and Long John Silver.

From there things basically follow the book but on space in ships. Oh and the parrot on Silver is a blob called morph that can change shapes.

There is a supernova they have to fly through which is exciting, if a little bit confusing

Jim and Silver have a nice bond just like in the book, which makes him a complex villain. He is tough on him at first but a warm mentor.

That’s where we get our one song and I really liked it.

In particular, they have a discussion which feels genuine and is very well written:

All of this bonding makes the betrayal of Silver quite devastating, like his father leaving all over again.

Eventually they get to Treasure Planet and they meet BEN the robot voiced by Martin Short. It seemed odd to me to introduce such a big star voiced character so late in the movie but he’s fun. They find a portal to guide them to the treasure and I do not think the CGI on the scene has aged well.

Silver and Jim battle with their respective teams to get the treasure until Silver must decide whether to pick his friend or the money. Then through some quick thinking and bravery Jim and the ship escape out the port and head back home.

Just as in the book Silver is able to escape in a nice scene between him and Jim and they return home with enough treasure to rebuild Jim’s Mother’s inn.

Movie Review/Conclusion-

It may sound strange to say a movie that looks this inventive could be predictable but because they chose such an oft-filmed novel as the base it does. After a few minutes I have accepted the steampunk look and so it doesn’t really surprise me after that and the story is standard.

It’s kind of like if a Baz Luhrmann film where he has all this inventive costumes and look but the story is pretty obvious. Great Gatsby, for instance, is based on a classic novel but it looks and sounds different; however, it didn’t work because the story and pacing was slow and the same Gatsby we all know from high school. The new look on a classic can only get you so far. A story so well done like Great Gatsby or Treasure Island feels predictable and slow very quickly.

The voices are good. The artistry for the most part is good. Some of the CGI does not age well and there are a few times when I didn’t really understand what the stakes were in this steampunk world. I was supposed to feel tension but since I didn’t know what a supernova in space does to Victorian technology it took away the tension.

The characters are good. The appearance is different than typical Treasure Island movies but the personalities are basically the same.

Every other time Disney has done a traditional fairytale or popular story they have injected something new and different into the story (not just the design). For instance, Cinderella has the mice and songs to differentiate it from other Cinderellas. Aladdin has the character of the Genie in a whole new way (not just appearance) to make it feel new.

Treasure Planet thought if they could draw it in a new way it would have the same effect but it didnt. To me it felt tedious, but I admire what they were trying to do.

Overall Grade- C

Movie 42: Lilo and Stitch

October 1, 2014October 1, 2014 | Rachel's Reviews

There probably is not a movie I am more personally divided on in the Disney Canon than Lilo and Stitch. About half I LOVE and the other half not as much… I guess you could say I love the Lilo but not as crazy about the Stitch.

The Production-

As much as I enjoy the big epic Disney movies like Frozen I also love the smaller, more intimate pictures like Lilo and Stitch.

In fact, after 3 or 4 commercial disappointments they decided to embrace the Dumbo strategy. Back in the late 1930s Disney had 2 financial ambitious failures in Fantasia and Pinocchio. Bambi was also full of delays and expenses. Walt decided to pull a few animators and make a simple, easy to draw but likable film and they came up with Dumbo.

Dumbo had watercolor backgrounds instead of the layers like Bambi and the characters were relatively simple and appealing. The strategy worked and Dumbo was a big hit.

Lilo and Stitch followed this strategy all the way down to the stunning watercolor backgrounds.

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Looking for an easy to execute idea Disney turned inward and animator Chris Sanders pitched a book he had drawn in the 80s about a girl who adopts the world’s meanest alien.

The animators liked the idea and decided on Kaua’i Hawaii as the setting because of the spirit of family, its visibility from space, culture, music and it had never been done before in an animated film.

They do a great job not just showing the lush paradise of Hawaii but also the poverty and harder sides. It feels like a place people actually live.

small town hawaii — I love this small town Hawaii feel. It nails how it actually looks

The adult actors are all lesser known (more cost cutting) except for Ving Rhames as Cobra Bubbles. Many of the cast like Tia Carrere and Jason Scott Lee who play Nani and David are Hawaiian.

Another cost cutting measure was using traditional Hawaiian songs and Elvis numbers which made the soundtrack easy to put together and had minimal recording. I guess because I love Hawaiian music and Elvis I LOVE the soundtrack!

There’s a personal reason I respond to the Hawaiian setting and culture in the film. In 2007 I was starting to come out of a very dark period. There was a time when I felt I had lost the ability to feel happiness. Then I made big changes in my life in early 2007 but hadn’t made the tough decision to quit my job.

That summer my girlfriends and I went to Hawaii and had the most amazing trip. It was an awakening for me. I realized I could be happy. That life was beautiful and lush. I called my Dad the night before we were leaving and cried my eyes out. The idea of leaving such happiness made me so sad. I realized I needed to quit my job and create a happy life for myself.

I guess you could say the ohana spirit moved me and made me a better person.

I’ve been back three times since then and each time I leave feeling renewed and happy. Watching Lilo and Stitch with its music, surfing, watercolor mountains, hula and everything else brings back those memories which are always close to my heart (I need to get back!)

The intro really captures the ohana magic

It was also the first Disney classic to be nominated for Best Animated Film at the Oscars but lost out to Spirited Away (who wouldn’t lose to that masterpiece?)

The Story-

So let’s continue on this vein by talking about the things in the story that best show the Hawaii I love. Lilo and Stitch is about 2 sisters, Lilo and Nani who’s parents have passed on and are forced to try and make their ‘broken family’ work.

These scenes between the two sisters are perfect. I wouldn’t change them one bit.

Here they are arguing like all sisters do, but I so relate to Nani because I was the older sister carrying for a sister and a brother who were 16 and 18 years younger than me. I get how she was feeling

And then this scene is perfect too. This felt like a real sisterly moment.

The prayer at the end of it just breaks my heart and is one of the few prayers in Disney films. Again wouldn’t change a thing.

I love that Lilo is a weird little girl. She has a strange doll and doesn’t get along with the other little girls. She tries to feed sandwiches to fish and is just a strange kid- like all kids! (especially a kid who has experienced recent trauma).

I also love this is a Disney movie about a little girl. That is actually pretty rare. Most Disney movies are about adolescent girls like Ariel, Belle, Pocahontas etc. I love that little girls have a little girl in a Disney film they can relate too and feel a little less alone in their strangeness.

Unfortunately there are problems for Nani and a social worker is concerned about her problems keeping a job and the stress of carrying for Lilo. He’s not a bad guy- just doing his job, but the threat of the ‘ohana’ being taken away is palatable throughout the movie. Not so much it is depressing but a real fear propelling the story forward.

Now we get to the part I don’t like…

Nani decides to let Lilo adopt a dog. At the shelter the find a weird creature who Lilo names Stitch:

We have seen earilier in the film that Stitch is an alien genetic mutation created by a mad scientist alien for world domination.

I’m sorry but I just don’t like the look of any of the aliens. Stitch looks like a cockroach, which I guess is appropriate for Hawaii but it was so unpleasant to look at (I hate cockroaches btw!). And he is so awful. Everything else in the movie is so sweet and tender having this maniac alien thrown in hurt the tone and I couldn’t wait for him to get off the screen.

The other aliens are all modeled off of sea creatures and they don’t look much better and are kind of boring. I kept wanting it to be done with the alien story and get back to the sisters. This movie should have been simple like The Fox and the Hound but it decided to pay homage to ET. The problem is ET was kind of cute and aside from frogs and resees pieces he didn’t really hurt anything. Plus, Elliott’s family is not in crisis like Lilo’s so it feels like too much for Stitch to destroy their house (literally), make Nani loose multiple jobs and more.

I don’t know how you have enough story without the Stitch but maybe just tone him down a little bit or make him a little bit cuter. Make him something good to the family not another struggle. Hmmm

I did like Lilo teaching Stitch how to dance like Elvis and hula.

The ending drags a bit and it could have been 10 minutes shorter (or follow the example of Dumbo and make it 62 minutes!). I don’t want to give everything away but there is some fun action and the spaceships are pretty cool.

We do get a nice moment where even Stitch learns he has found his ‘little and broken family’ (that gets me every time!).

And we get a little Elvis which is tons of fun.

Movie Review/Conclusion

So like I said I have mixed feelings about Lilo and Stitch. I wish I could excise all the Stitch stuff out and just make it about the sisters. I loved their relationship. I loved the Hawaiian culture. I loved the watercolor look. I loved the music both Hawaiian and Elvis. I love the focus on families and ohana, and I love that Lilo is a little girl not an adolescent who behaves like a little girl.

I still think Stitch is one of the ugliest animated creatures ever created and the scenes with all the aliens drag. I found myself itching to get back to the sisters. It was so much more compelling. Unfortunately this is a large part of the movie so it is a problem.

It makes giving a grade very difficult .

I guess I’m going to treat it like Bambi. When Bambi works it works so well but when it doesn’t I’m not invested. I gave Bambi a B- so

Overall Grade- B-

Favorite Non-Disney Animated Movies

September 30, 2014October 1, 2014 | Rachel's Reviews

Hi guys!

I just thought you might be wondering what my opinion is on non-Disney animated films. I’m not talking Pixar,Studio Ghibli or other Disney wings because they should get their own list. I’m talking about other studios like Dreamworks, which while not as consistently my favorites like Disney, they have made some great animated films.

So here we go in no particular order.

1. The Adventures of Tintin- underrated action adventure movie. Yes, it is motion capture not traditional animation but I figure if it looks, feels, acts like an animated film it is an animated film. More people should have seen this movie. It was so entertaining!

2. The Lego Movie- one of the most visually inventive movies I’ve ever seen. The effects with the legos blew me away. Great voice work by whole cast, and the script is so well written. Every joke got a laugh from me and then there’s moments that were surprisingly tender. It is the best movie I’ve seen at capturing how a child plays with their toys and how incapable adults are at understanding that play.

3. Kung Fu Panda 1 and 2- both films are very entertaining with a likable lead character, fun action, beautiful visuals, and great villains.

4. Secret of Nimh- wonderful movie featuring one of the toughest Moms in movies. She doesn’t want to be a hero but will do anything for her son. There’s humor, adventure and most importantly real heart.

5. Anastasia- one of the best animated romantic comedies put onto film. Great chemistry, a fun villain, and decent music. The story is silly but I still find it very entertaining.

6. How to Train Your Dragon- haven’t seen sequel but want to. Original was very entertaining. It’s a predictable story but told very well. Great voice cast and a great heart to the story of Hiccup and his desire to please his demanding father. The relationship between him and the dragon is very absorbing. Beautiful flying visuals.

7. Prince of Egypt- some people have problems with the changes from the Biblical story but not me. I am mad for the music, just love it and the scene where Moses communes with the burning bush is breathtaking. I’m a huge fan of biblical epics and this stands with the best.

8. Arthur Christmas- A movie I thought looked really stupid and then totally surprised me. Santa’s youngest son Arthur believes in bringing Christmas to every child and when he finds a girl has been missed will do anything to make it right. I love the idea that even the North Pole has become over-commercialized for Christmas. I love Christmas movies so this is a big win. Great voice cast. Real heart.

9. Chicken Run- An homage to Dirty Dozen and other prison escape movies from the 50s. Great writing and voice work. Terrific villain and the stop motion animation is fabulous.

10. Transformers 1986- Michael Bay should be strapped down and forced to watch this movie for a week straight to understand how it should be done. Those bloated, obnoxious mess of movies don’t have 1/10th the heart of this animated film. Orson Wells is Optimus Prime and he is great. It’s got action and fun characters and with every Michael Bay monstrosity it looks better and better (Transformers 2 and 3 are 2 of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. I just can’t see 4. It’s too much.) Boys deserve better transformers movies and this animated film gives it to them. .

11. Charlotte’s Web- One of the best non-Disney animated musicals. Sweet songs with great vocal performances by Debbie Reynolds and Paul Lynde. It’s actually pretty sad but in a way that will teach kids about friendship and sacrifice.

12. Iron Giant- If you haven’t seen this film, stop what you are doing, go out and watch it. The animation is stunning. The story has real heart and lovely characters. It is a total winner!

13. Paranorman- everyone who thinks I’m a total softy when it comes to darker movies will probably be surprised to find this on my list. I like a good ghost story and this definitely fits the bill. It’s more for teens than children. Some of the images are pretty scary and the humor, like the jock actually being gay, is probably more for teens than little kids. It looks amazing. Has some genuine scares and the story surprised me. Very well done.

14. Simpsons Movie- Everyone is always shocked to find out I love the Simpsons. My favorite show of all time. My brother and sister and I would watch it every week and 26 seasons later still do. The movie is overwritten and could have been better but I still really enjoy it. I love the characters and the HD colors add a nice touch to the movie over the TV show. Simpsons has given me so many laughs I love it. Lisa is my particular favorite.

15. Pirates: Band of Misfits- A movie nobody saw but I really enjoyed. It’s funny with Charles Darwin as our unlikely hero. The stop motion looks great and voice work is engaging. A hidden gem!

16. Curious George- So few movies are made well for children under 5. Curious George is one of those movies. It is sweet and engaging with lovely songs from Jack Johnson. One that is unabashadly for the smallest of children and yet adults won’t be miserable.

17. Lord of the Rings (Bakshi)- It’s not as good as the Peter Jackson movies but it is also a different take on an epic story. To me there is room for multiple retellings of the Lord of the Rings and Bakshi crams a lot of story into this film. Maybe not a masterpiece but I enjoy it. The music is wonderful and characters engrossing. If you like the story of Lord of the Rings give this animated version a chance. I think this is what the Black Cauldron was trying to be and it isn’t near as successful.

18. Batman Mask of the Phantasm- Still my favorite Batman movie (yes, you read right). Intense without being too violent. Batman is interesting without being over-the-top. I hate in the live action movies how the villains are always more interesting than Batman. Not the case here. Great animation. Great voice work. If you haven’t seen it and love the Nolan films give it a shot.

19. Happy Feet- A flawed film but I love the music and it is so unabashedly cheerful I enjoy it. It’s the kind of movie I put in when I’m sick and it brightens my day. Huge talented cast and serviceable story.

20. Charlie Brown Christmas Special- I realize this was for TV but I couldn’t not include it. One of the best Christmas movies ever made. Perfect soundtrack. Lovely message and delightful characters. It focuses on the Christ message of Christmas in a way that is powerful without being overbearing.

Movie 41: Atlantis: The Lost Empire

September 30, 2014September 30, 2014 | Rachel's Reviews

Today is a good example of why I am glad I started this project. In 2001 when Disney’s 41st animated film Atlantis: The Lost Emperor came out I was underwhelmed by it. I remember thinking it was boring (an adjective I try to never use in my reviews because it doesn’t mean anything). It seems hard to believe because the movie I watched today was a fast paced delight. I am truly shocked how much I enjoyed it! (I was 20 by the way in 2001 so it wasn’t like a child who might be more likely to find this boring).

This review is going to be a little different than some of my others because I want to give you guys the chance to go into the film spoiler free. I am spoiler proof. For some reason repetition doesn’t bother me and I legitimately do not care if I know the ending to things. But that said, I think for this type of action adventure movie it will be more fun to not have every detail dissected like other Disney films which most people have seen.

Go out, rent it and give it another shot!!!! At the very least I don’t think you will have a terrible time at the movies and I bet you will enjoy it!

Here’s the trailer to give you an idea of the story (it is a very good non-spoilery trailer. They don’t even give away the villain and I won’t either)

The Production-

I can talk a little bit about the production without giving anything away. After Hunchback the crew wanted to stay together but go in a radically different direction so Gary Trousdale, Kirk Wise, Don Hahn and others set out to make Disney’s first science fiction movie and one of their few original stories.

There is a definite steampunk feel with its influences from Jules Verne and Victorian/futuristic mashups. The ship could be the nautilus from 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea.

They visited museums, researched a variety of cultures and created their own version of Atlantis. According to my research it had Mayan, Greek, Cambodian, Indian and Tibetan elements.

atlatnis language — The Atlantean language was created both written and spoken.

They even hired the guy who created the Klingon language to make one for Atlantis. That is just cool.

They had good writers including Joss Whedon who worked on the project for a while and then Tab Murphey took over and it has a Whedon team feel to it. Milo is the lead in the movie looking for Atlantis but he quickly gets joined by a rag-tag crew that is very diverse for Disney and full of surprises. It’s like the Steampunk Avengers!

The voice acting is mostly unknowns except for Michael J Fox as Milo, James Garner as Captain Rourke, John Mahoney as Whitmore, Jim Varney as Cookie and Leonard Nimoy as the King.

They also hired Mike Mignola, creator of the Hellboy comics, as a production designer and you can see his influence in the film even down to the hands he uses in his drawings:

“I remember watching a rough cut of the film and these characters have these big, square, weird hands. I said to the guy next to me, “Those are cool hands.”

And he says to me, “Yeah, they’re your hands. We had a whole meeting about how to do your hands.” It was so weird I couldn’t wrap my brain around it”

I love that comic book influence on the film and yet it avoids cliches in a lot of the characters (yes they fulfill certain tropes like the tough talking female mechanic but then she has moments of softness). There’s a moment where you feel like Milo is alone and it actually seems like he is being left and then the movie is very clever with what happens with the characters and story.

I liked every character in the movie, and I’m not normally a sci-fi person.

They were also influenced by anime at the time and particularly Hayao Miyazaki and his amazing adventure stories, and I think they pull off a lovely homage.

Some of the mysticism is a little convoluted with the blue crystals and everything but for this kind of story I bought it. And the imagery is beautiful.

The only thing parents will want to be aware of is Princess Kida wears very skimpy clothing and bathing suits throughout the film.

The score is by James Newton Howard and it is excellent but there are no songs (funny coming from the troop of Hunchback and Beauty and the Beast!). But I’m glad because they really weren’t necessary. The score is all we need to create tension.

The movie is also very funny. Characters like the Moleman and Cookie were a lot of fun.

It is also one of the few Disney movies that doesn’t really have a strong romance. It just allows you to focus on the characters. I like that.

Movie Review/Conclusion-

I’ll say it again I was genuinely shocked how much I enjoyed Atlantis: The Lost Empire. It was exciting, beautifully drawn, with a fun troop of characters to root for.

Unlike in 2001, I did not think it was boring this time around. In fact, it seemed to clip along quite quickly. There also isn’t tons of exposition. They just present the world, language and everything else and let you figure it out as the characters do.

I liked the women in the picture. Kida isn’t the perfect savage you expect. Mechanic Audrey had some layers to her. Not every decision was easy, and Helga is not someone to get pushed around (she surprised me! Totally kicked butt!).

All the characters have their moment and there is humor and tough action. I loved the sound design. In fight scenes you hear punches and grunts. It helps immerse you in the experience.

There are some holes in the story and things happen in relatively tidy ways but isn’t that usually the case for these kind of movies? I mean if you start to take apart Indiana Jones movies they are very tidy too and completely implausible but it’s a B Summer movie with great action and fun characters so you go with it.

In any case, for whatever reason, I didn’t buy it at 21 but really enjoyed it at 33. Maybe I’m not the same person I was back then? Go figure!

But seriously, give this movie another shot. Go out, rent it, and let me know what you think. I bet a lot of you will be pleasantly surprised like I was!

Overall Grade- A-

It might be a little hard for kids under 7 to follow so keep that in mind.

Books Into Movies

September 29, 2014 | Rachel's Reviews

I thought you guys might enjoy this. It is books I think would make a good movie (or a new version would be good). I think True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle would make a great Disney movie. I can’t figure out why that hasn’t been adapted.
What books do you think would make good movies?

Movie 40: Emperor’s New Groove

September 29, 2014September 29, 2014 | Rachel's Reviews

Do you think David Spade is funny?

Just like with Tarzan and Phil Collins, it is easy to figure out if Emperor’s New Groove is a movie you will enjoy. The lead character Kuzco is voiced by David Spade and if you think his brand of sarcastic humor is funny you will probably like the movie. If not, this one can be a skip.

Luckily I do think he is funny, and I do enjoy this movie.

For some reason we are usually quick to dismiss comedies, whether animated or live action, as being less worthy of praise than dramas or musicals. I’m not sure why this is because if anything making people laugh is harder than making them cry. That’s at least my experience. In writing for Nanowrimo the sections where I am trying to tell a joke are brutal and what I think is funny others don’t give a chuckle. So I stand up for comedies, especially Disney comedies.

While Disney has comedy in most of its movies there are 5 I would classify as outright comedies-

1. Jungle Book

2. Robin Hood

3. Aladdin

4. Hercules

5. Emperor’s New Groove

Each of these comedies for me has strengths but as far as non-stop laughs I think Emperor’s New Groove is the best. Jungle Book has great music, Robin Hood adds some adventure and dry wit, Hercules goes gospel, and Aladdin has the funniest single performance in Disney, but it feels like Emperor’s has a joke every 2 sentences and for me 99% of them make me laugh. Therefore, it is a successful comedy.

I also appreciate the comedy is funny for adults and children. It’s not like Shrek with innuendo and lewd humor. Most of it is very sarcastic asides, oftentimes breaking the 4th wall (the characters talking to the audience).

The story is also cooky enough to also make laughter easy. It’s all so ridiculous it puts us in a mood to laugh. In fact, when I first heard about a Disney movie about a man being turned into a llama I thought it sounded so stupid, but then I saw it at my college theater and laughed a lot. Such low expectations made it feel even better than it was but it has held up and still makes me laugh.

Production-

The production behind this movie is interesting. They had originally assigned Roger Allers from The Lion King to direct a serious picture called The Kingdom of the Sun. They hired Sting to write the songs and his wife made a documentary on the mess (not available I checked everywhere).

Delays kept happening and Michael Eisner was feeling the heat from McDonalds and other companies who were waiting for a movie. He put the pressure on Allers to produce a film but it was still slow so Eisner asked writers Mark Dindal and Chris Williams to write a 2nd script just in case.

It got up to a year and change before the release date. Sponsors were getting nervous so Eisner pulled the plug on Kingdom of the Sun, Allers quit and Dindal and Williams completely retooled their idea into what we see today.

Poor Sting was left with only 1 song in the credits. The only other song is sung by Tom Jones called Perfect World which is our intro to Kuzco.

The movie did fine at the box office but word of mouth has made it very popular.

There are celebrity voices just as in the Lion King including David Spade, John Goodman, Ertha Kitt, Patrick Warburton, Wendie Malick, Jon Fielder

The animation really isn’t that special. It is supposed to be an Incan world but just like with Hercules there is no attempt to be true to the time period or lore of the native people. This is a comedy and it stands only upon its writing, which I liked.

The Story-

The introduction is very good. We see Kuzco as a llama in the rain telling us what a sad situation he is in. He then begins to narrate the story in flashback starting with what a greedy pig he is (but in a comical way)

He’s so greedy in fact that he is going to build a summer home called Kuztopia on the site of a village where our hero, Pacha lives voiced by John Goodman.

He fires Yzma his ‘assistant’ and she grows angry and decides to poison him. Yzma is a great villain voiced by Ertha Kitt. Maybe not the most complex but very funny. I love when they try to use a trap door and it ends up taking her to crocodiles ‘why do we have that lever.’

Unfortunately her poison plot doesn’t go as planned:

Yzma has an assistant named Kronk who is hilarious. He is a loveable buffoon who loves to cook and battles angels and devils on his shoulders (literally). The writing for Kronk is consistently funny.

Yzma tells Kronk to get rid of Kuzco but he puts him on Pacha’s wagon and figures he’s done for.

Pacha finds Kuzco as a llama and is reluctant to help him since he was so rude about the summer home, but being a good guy and hoping he can convince him to change his mind, Pacha rescues him in a very funny section of slapstick (it reminds me of Captain Hook and the crocodile scenes in Peter Pan).

Pacha is very caring towards Kuzco despite his continued bad attitude and rudeness (creating a lot of the humor). For example, there’s a nice moment where Kuzco is cold and Pacha gives him his poncho for the night.

They end up making it back to a bridge and it breaks trapping Pacha. To his horror Kuzco says he is not going to help him and that he is going to have him arrested once they get to the castle. Pacha yells back ‘we shook hands’ calling back to an earlier conversation. Then Kuzco trips and they both end up suspended and we get a funny scene with a nice message on trust and teamwork

On the other side of the bridge it is going to be 4 more days together so they end up at a diner in a very funny scene. Yzma and Kronk are also at the diner but neither of them know it. This is just classical physical comedy

Kuzco realizes Yzma tried to kill him and the llama was just a mistake and they find out Yzma and Kronk are at Pacha’s home.

Pacha’s family is one of the best family’s in all of Disney, and his wife is pregnant which is the first time a pregnant woman has been on an animated feature. Go pregnant women! But seriously cool to show all types of women not just pretty adolescent girls.

The kids are very funny locking Kronk and Yzma in the closet and give Pacha and Kuzco time to run away.

Finally they get to the castle and as they look for the potion Yzma is there and we get a great chase sequence that I think is just as good if not better than the wizards duel in Sword in the Stone (still don’t get all the love for that movie) . They turn into all different shapes and sizes depending on the potion they drink.

My favorite is probably when she turns into a cat and has a new voice:

In the end, Kuzco is changed back, Kronk is head of the junior chipmunks and Kuzcotopia is no longer built on Pacha’s village. (Even that you get a good joke with a man Kuzco threw through a window saying ‘it wasn’t the first time and it won’t be the last time’. That’s funny to imagine an old man frequently being thrown through windows)

Movie Review/Conclusion-

It shouldn’t take you more than 5 minutes to know whether it is for you or not. The tone and type of humor is obvious from the start and it either makes you laugh or it doesn’t. For me, it does, and I think that is worthy of praise.

There is some nice messaging and I think the villain is pretty good but all that would be nothing if the jokes weren’t so consistently funny and so plentiful.

So give it a shot. It’s humor your whole family can enjoy which is actually kind of rare. Nothing inappropriate or offensive. Just sarcastic, silly comedy.

The animation is on the Saturday morning level and it is probably on par with good Disney afternoon episodes of Ducktales or Tailspin in that department.

The voice acting is uniformly good and the Tom Jones number at the beginning is fun (if you have a boy who hates musicals this is a good one for him).

My score is going to seem high but it truly did make me laugh that much, and it is one I find myself wanting to rewatch again and again.

Overall Grade- A-

Disney Renaissance Best and Worse

September 28, 2014 | Rachel's Reviews

So I recently finished reviewing the Disney Renaissance and I know how everyone loves lists, so I will do my best at ranking these films (and I will try to not have everything be Beauty and the Beast and Little Mermaid.

Best Villain-

Gold- Ursula

Silver- Scar

Bronze- Gaston

Best Artistry-

Gold- Tarzan

Silver- Beauty and the Beast

Bronze- Hunchback of Notre Dame

Favorite Lead Character/Hero-

Gold- Belle

Silver- Mulan

Bronze- Ariel

Favorite Side Character-

Gold- Genie

Silver- Sebastian

Bronze- Lumiere

Even More Minor Characters-

Gold- Wilbur, Rescuers Down Under

Silver- Mushu

Bronze- Zazu

Best Vocal Performance-

Gold- Robin Williams, Aladdin

Silver- Samuel Wright, Little Mermaid

Bronze- Pat Carroll, Little Mermaid

Honorable Mention- John Candy, Rescuers Down Under

Best Original Score-

Gold- Lion King, Hans Zimmer

Silver- Rescuers Down Under, Bruce Broughton

Bronze- Little Mermaid, Alan Menken

Best Song- (this is tough)

Gold-Part of Your World- Menken and Ashman

Silver- Be Our Guest- Menken and Ashman

Bronze-Friend Like Me- Menken and Ashman

Honorable Mentions- Out There (Menken and Schwartz), Under the Sea (Menken and Ashman), A Star is Born (Menken and Zippel), You’ll Be in My Heart (Phil Collins), Reflection (Wilder and Zippel)

Best Villain Song-

Gold- Poor Unfortunate Souls, Menken and Ashman

Silver- Be Prepared, Elton John and Tim Rice

Bronze- Savages, Menken and Schwartz

Honorable Mentions- Gaston (Menken and Ashman),

Worst Villain-

Gold- Radcliffe

Silver- Clayton

Bronze- Shan-yu

Saddest Moment-

Gold- Mufasa’s death

Silver- Quasimodo getting mocked and tied up by gypsies

Bronze- Beast dies

Best Comedy-

Gold- Aladdin

Silver- Hercules

Bronze- Rescuers Down Under (not a comedy but the funny moments were so funny)

Scariest Moment-

Gold- Mcleach and the knife throwing, Rescuers Down Under

Silver- Mob Song, Beauty and the Beast

Couldn’t think of anything else scary in Renaissance. That’s strange.

Cringe-worthy Moment

Gold- Burning down house with family in it, Hunchback

Silver- Hellfire, rape and murder song, Hunchback

Bronze- Pocahontas teaching John Smith about how gold is stupid, Pocahontas

Honorable Mention- Basically all of Pocahontas except Savages number

Underrated

Gold- Rescuers Down Under

Silver- Mulan

Bronze- Hercules

Most Romantic Moment-

Gold- Belle and Beast dancing

Silver- Kiss the Girl

Bronze- Jasmine and Aladdin kiss

Grand Champions-

Worst- Pocahontas

Best- Beauty and the Beast

Co-Best- Little Mermaid (I love both so much!)

I just finished reviewing Dinosaur (oh my…) and here’s how we currently stand rating-wise

A+ we have 6	B+ we have 4	C+ we have 2	D we have 3

A we have 9	B we have 1	C we have 3	D- we have 3

A- we have 2	B- we have 1	C- we have 3	F we have 1

What are your favorites from the Renaissance? Please share.

Thank you to everyone for your comments. We might not always agree but I enjoying conversing with all of you!

Rachel's Reviews

Rottentomatoes Certified Critic. Reviews of the latest movies especially animation as well as classic reviews, family movie night picks and more

Author: Rachel's Reviews

Movie 45: Home on the Range

Movie 44: Brother Bear

Movie 43: Treasure Planet

Movie 42: Lilo and Stitch

Favorite Non-Disney Animated Movies

Movie 41: Atlantis: The Lost Empire

Books Into Movies

Movie 40: Emperor’s New Groove

Disney Renaissance Best and Worse